At any given time in Vegas you're liable to run into a celebrity. The Lovely Mary (TLM) and I were no exception this trip as we ran into no less than 5 famous people. Ok, ok, so they aren't exactly superstars or household names (as a matter of fact I didn't even know most of their names at the times we saw them), but their sightings prompted a "hey, there's that guy", or a "wasn't he in that commercial?", or at least a "look, it's [enter wrong name here]", so they must be somewhere between lists D and Z, right?
It all started off last Saturday night at the Mandalay Bay when we found ourselves wandering through bullriding fanatics and fight lovers when out of the corner of my eye I saw a woman parading a blond wig and a loud, tawdry, and very revealing dress through the crowd. It took only a glimpse of her face (yes, that's what I was looking at!) to recognize her as "Hottie" (real name Schatar Sapphira Taylor) from the first season of VH1's "Flavor of Love". She was the one who tried to cook a chicken in the microwave for Flav's mom and later got dismissed for having been exposed as an actress (and I use the term extremely loosely). I pointed her out to TLM, who acknowledged her identity with a simple "bleh", and when the encounter came up later in conversation, she described "Hottie" simply as "Dasty" (dirty+nasty)...'nuff said.
The next night TLM and I went to check out the Fashion Show Mall (guess which one of us found that place) and we stopped afterwards to have some tapas at a place called Cafe Ba-Ba-Reeba. We were just finishing off a beef empanada, some chicken and ham croquettes, and some very tasty sangria when I looked over and saw a tall, long haired man eating with a his jet black cowboy hat placed delicately in the seat to his left and a short-haired blond placed on the one to his right. I knew he looked familiar, and soon realized he was one of those professional poker players I'd seen on ESPN. In fact, he was probably the only one I'd even be able to recognize at all, and he had one of those catchy nicknames, too...in this case, "Jesus". It wasn't until we spoke to one of TLM's coworkers later that night that we learned his name is Chris Ferguson, and besides being good at poker another of his claims to fame is that he can pitch a playing card through a carrot. I guess we all gotta be good at something, eh?
During one of our jaunts down the strip, we were passing through the Luxor's casino when TLM noticed a crowd gathering near the hotel's entrance, so we walked over to take a look. People seemed really excited, so we assumed it was someone big. Eh, not so much, but at least it was someone whose actual name we knew: Criss Angel (yeah, he spells it that way) who's a close-up illusionist and has a pretty entertaining show on A&E I've seen a few times called Mindfreak. We asked around and got an unusually large amount of information about the event from these two middle-aged women who could hardly contain themselves (who knew this guy commanded such unabashed fanaticism?). Anyway, they told us he was moving his base of operations to the Luxor (from where, who knows) and that the event was the official welcoming ceremony. We were also told that he was going to perform an illusion to be taped for season 3 of his show in the cordoned off area we were standing right next to. Well, after waiting for about half an hour and being prompted by some producers to cheer for the cameras a few times, he finally makes his way into the hotel, stops to thank the people for being so supportive, turns around, and leaves. Now that's what I call tricking people.
The quickest psuedo-celebrity sighting I had was Greg Proops, who has had guest appearances on all kinds of shows and is probably best known for his improv work on "Who's Line is it Anyway?", though I remember him from a short-lived favorite show of mine on Comedy Central called "Tough Crowd with Colin Quinn" (unfortunately, Colin Quinn's modus operandi of "laugh at me and not with me" is what killed it). Anyway, he walked briskly by me in the Mandalay Bay casino looking pretty desheveled, and I got the sense he either just lost a lot of money at some table or bombed on stage. My theory is that all comedians (and magicians for that matter) are inherently depressed, so maybe that's just how he always looks when not on stage or on camera.
Last, and maybe least, we were on our plane home and I looked across to see this guy sleeping, facing me (so I could get a nice view of his open mouth and maybe a little drool). I noticed the emblem on his hat said "Mike the Mouth" and had some playing cards on it, and that rang a distant bell with me. Later in the flight, I overheard him identifying himself to the guy next to him as a professional poker player, and in fact he was Mike Matusow, not surprisingly also known as "Mike the Mouth" (modesty gets you everywhere, including flying coach). I didn't talk to him much, but did find out he was on his way to Foxwoods for a tournament. What I should have asked was what "professional poker player" meant. Does he get sponsored to play or has he just won enough poker tournaments to have earned the title? Either way, I reserve the right to hate on him for playing cards for a living. Besides, he had a fanny pack...
In any case, there was no Cameron Diaz, Robert DeNiro, nor Christopher Walken to be found during our stay, nor would they have any particular reason to be, I suppose (though I hear Walken is running for President in '08), but we saw enough at least to write about.
Maybe write too much about...
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